fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck

I want to be perfect, I want to walk down the street, beautifully drunken, at ease with some friends, smoking a cigarette, lightheaded, wanted, hugged, picked up by strong arms, making me feel covered by warm flesh all over, because I am so small and fragile     

I want long wavy hair running like waterfalls down my back that swing gracefully across my back when I walk across the world, I want wind to blow through it so that those strong arms that held me feel it touching gently their skin, making them shiver of want and desire of me     

Because I want to be wanted and I want so much I want so much I want so much

Tattoos

Snow

This picture makes me ridiculously happy.

.

I ate so much today and I feel disgusting. I’m such a failure. I’m in the communications computer place at college and this guy is sitting beside me making these retarded stretching noises, laughing at his facebook page out loud and I’m really awkwarded out cause there’s just us.

I love it when the sun is soft enough to hug your skin comfortably and gently kiss your face i love it when the sun is bright enough to blind you so you never want to leave it’s embrace

 

My fucking mom.

I’ve been in school for one week now and I come home after work, sit at the computer to watch skins, and my mom jumps at me: YOU THINK YOU’RE GOING TO GET SOME GOOD GRADES SITTING ON YOUR ASS? DON’T YOU HAVE HOMEWORK? I’M TELLING YOU RIGHT NOW, I WON’T BE PAYING FOR A ROOF OVER YOUR HEAD AND FOOD IN YOUR PLATE IF YOU GET SHITTY GRADES FOR WATCHING STUPID SHOWS ON THE INTERNET!!!

First: I fucking get amazing fucking grades every year and she fucking reacts like this every goddamn semester.

Second: As long as I’m in school, you are obligated to pay for my stay at home, mother. Although I can’t wait to GTFO.

I want want want want want want want want want want

to feel cute and clumsy, not thick and sturdy

to feel Shy and mysterious, not rude and loud

to feel like people want to be with me because they think I am cute and clumsy and shy and mysterious, not thick sturdy rude and loud.